Things I learned in 2022

So here we are again, the business of Christmas is over and we have begun the big declutter that January inevitably brings. I know January can be a grim month for some after the sparkle and expectation of December but I really love the hunkering down that the cold and wet demands. It gives me the excuse to prioritise reading and to go to bed early and allows me to evaluate what went well in the year just completed whilst also making decisions about what is no longer serving me and therefore is time to let go off.

So grab yourself a cuppa, light a candle, pull that blanket up and let’s begin …

1)     That I HAVE to live with integrity.

I have been ill in 2022 more than any other year in my life. Nothing serious but lots of sicknesses, bugs and my 3rd bout of covid led me to read Martha Becks’ book The way of integrity: finding the path to your true self. I thoroughly recommend this book! It really opened my eyes and made me realise that by continuing to work in a role that was not only not bringing me joy but was also potentially making me ill it was time to make a decision that I have been flirting with for years and set up my own Interior Design Studio. I already feel lighter and cannot wait to embrace the challenges this will bring for me in 2023.

2)    That making myself vulnerable and asking for help is actually a superpower.

I have always hated not being in control of situations (hence being the organiser of every hen do I have ever been on!) and in the past, I have thought that asking for help was a sign of weakness or was highlighting that I wasn’t perfect (which side note I’m really not and – that is totally normal!) So, in 2022 I practised making myself vulnerable by saying no to things I previously would have agreed to take on or do and I can let you into a secret, it is so liberating! In fact, the more I say no to things the more powerful I feel because I am prioritising myself and the things I want to do. I am no longer making decisions that I now see were people-pleasing. Having boundaries is so important and whilst it is not always easy for those you are setting them with, they are essential for your own mental health and well-being.

3)    That finding your tribe is essential.

We moved to our village 2 ½ years ago in the summer in between the two national lockdowns here in the UK. It was a tricky time to move because whilst people were welcoming there weren’t community events we could join in with and people were prioritising seeing those they already knew rather than making new connections.

2022 brought the opportunity to make new friends in abundance because both my children changed schools. We totally underestimated how emotional it would be for the children to leave behind valued and established friendships and we all had to put on our big brave pants to put ourselves out there to make new friends. It has totally paid off and I have made some wonderful new friends (which as an adult really isn’t easy!)

I joined a yoga group and have met some wonderful ladies who have taught me so much in the short space of time I have known them.

I have also joined a business support group called Interior Designers Hub who are helping me set up my Interior Design business and will hopefully help me to avoid making too many obvious mistakes along the way!

4)   That the only person who can make a change in my life is me.

Sounds obvious right? But, be honest how often do you put things off sighting other people as the reason? Do you find yourself saying things like “I will do X once the kids are sleeping through the night” or “When my boss gives me a pay rise I will feel happier” or perhaps “I will wait for my friend to call me before committing.”

I feel like in 2022 I had an epiphany by realising I do not need to wait for everything to be right or for someone to give me permission, if I want to do something I am going to do it. Even if it is scary sometimes!

And finally, that I love dahlias!

I was first introduced to dahlias in 2021 by Gardeners World when they visited a viewer’s allotment and it was love at first sight and now I am totally obsessed! I grew my dahlia beds from 2 to 4 at the start of 2022 and Mike’s building skills will be required again this spring as I visited Dahlia beach in October run by the lovely Andie (give her a follow on Instagram @dahliabeach) and purchased a further 10 plants. I may also have placed an order with Farmer Gracy (sorry Mike) for more tubers too. I am really like a kid in the proverbial sweet shop, they bring me so much joy with their colourful and varied blooms. The majority are planted in my front garden so they also bring other villagers happiness as they pass our home which is an added bonus and helps me justify the obsession!

My 2023 manifestations

It is so easy to focus on the challenges or negative things that occurred and reflecting back on the year is the ultimate act of gratitude for me. It allows me to search for and find the joy I have in my life and bring focus to it.

As for 2023, there will be big changes for me as I leave my Project Manager role and launch my Interior Design Business. As Glennon Doyle would say I am sc-cited (scared-excited) about this! I aim to have my first paying client by the end of April and am really looking forward to being a part of a world I have envied for so long.

I am going to increase the amount of nutritious food I eat and leave behind my dependence on sugar.

I will continue to learn and have a huge shelf of books waiting for me.

I am looking forward to spending more time working in my garden and I have also just joined the wait list for an allotment (keep your fingers crossed for me).

We will be taking our first holiday abroad since before COVID and I can’t wait to go to visit Crete with my family.

I am supremely excited about the return of Bridgerton on May 4th and want to make going to the cinema a priority.

I look forward to feeling calmer in 2023 as I make choices that mean I am living with integrity.

Let’s do this!

Becky x